RHOA – Ghosts of Boyfriends Past

This episode of  RHOA (Real Housewives of Atlanta)  was full of shade and drama!

Key moments with my commentary: 

  • Phe Phe, Porsha, and Shade by Sheree discuss Kenya and Sheree’s “fight”. Which includes throwing shade left and right.

My fave quotes:

  • “We came through serving camel toe!” – Phe Phe
  • “Thick cut bacon for some thick ass sisters…” – Phe Phe
  • ““A little dick is good! That’s what a little dick will do!” – Phe Phe
  • “Everyone knows Kenya slept her way to the top of the Z list dvd rack!” – Shady Sheree
  • “I ain’t never been associated with no hoes!” – Shady Sheree
  • “It’s not chateau Thelma, it’s in a trust” – Shady Sheree
  • “In a trust, can be in your momma name! She probably used your name while you grew up! Electric bill at 5 years old! “ – Clueless Porsha
  • “Maybe she’s a ground hog and sleeps in a hazmat suit!” – Phe Phe
    porsha-and-phe-phe
  • Krayonce Kenya and Matt workout at the park (Couple that work out together, stays together?) Or she’s so vain that she has to show her thotness fitness
  • Matt introduces Krayonce Kenya to his family. She’s concerned because she is 16 years older than Matt.
  • Meanwhile at the Kandi Factory, Kandi throws shade at the ladies for having openings without the finished product, Ie Shady Sheree’s fashion show with out clothes to show and Krayonce’s Kenya’s open American horror story house soft opening.
  • Kandi is having baby daddy issues with Riley’s dad Block. (What kind of name is Block? Obvious name for someone who doesn’t pay child support or make time to see his kid!)
  • Kandi needs some security at the Kandi Factory because homegirl Kris Kelly, Block’s gf decided to try to get her 5 minutes of fame talk to Kandi about Block and Riley’s father daughter relationship.
  • Kandi hates the word “baby daddy” and doesn’t want to call Block her baby daddy drama to stay on the show
  • Cynthia needs to love herself…Stop trying to get back with Papa smurf Peter, if he loved you, he would have tried harder.                                                                                                                                   cynthia
  • Porsha wants to be a mom so she reconnected with ex Chris, plans to ask him to be a sperm donor. (Girlfriend is going to need a nanny! I rather have adventures of Phe Phe and Porsha “Prowl in the City” or “Thotlandia”)
  • Like a bestie, Phaedra thinks it’s a bad idea
  • So what does Porsha do? The opposite! She meets up with Chris and lets him know that she wants his sperm… Unfortunately for her, he turns her down.
  • Shady Sheree can get a way hotter man than Bob. One that dresses up for a date and takes her to a nice place. Love yourself girl!
  • Matt and Kenya drive to Cincy, OH for the family reunion and Kenya is not having this road trip…she just wines and pouts, she hates road trips!
  • Matt’s sister is over Kenya before she fully gets to know her. Biggest concern is the age difference. (Really? They are both consenting adults!)
  • Matt’s mom is also over Kenya. (Guess these will be in-law hell!)
  • Kandi and Sheree color coordinate to the gym. (Both wear yellow.)
  • Kandi has a breakdown and needs a friend. Sheree is like well Bob….(Talk about being a good friend!)                                                                                                                                                                  kandi-tears
  • We also learn that Porsha used to date Block! (Gross!)

 

 

 

 

Until next time,

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RHOA – Housewife House Wars

Last night’s episode of RHOA (Real Housewives of Atlanta) on Bravo aka Part 2 of Keyonce Krayonce Kenya’s unfinished house housewarming party wasn’t just about a big party or drama, it was all shade.

Key moments with commentary:

  • Kenya decides to kick out her unwanted thot guest Porsha
  • Phe Phe Phaedra is done with this mess party, “atleast we got 5 minutes.” (That’s all you need in this unventilated condemned house.)
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  • Don’t feel sorry for Matt, he loves the crazy Keyonce Kenya paycheck
  • Why must Miss Manners Kenya leave her guests while she goes to her dungeon to chat up her slave Matt? Talk about being a bad hostess.
  • If guests break or scratch their heels on the messed up driveway, does Kenya pay for the Shoe Doctor? Couldn’t girlfriend get some golf carts to drive people down to Moore Chainsaw Massacre Manor?rhoa-frick-frack
  • Phaedra walking around with Porsha saying how great this horror movie set looks.
  • ShadebySheree decided to leave the party to get some gossip from Porsha and Phe Phe
  • Are Todd and Kandi trying to make a spin-off titled “Raising Ace?” Instagram and branding smell like a start of a show.
  • Mama Joyce thinks she is a lawyer, wearing dollar store Herve Leger, and talking trash about Phe Phe while Khandi cheers her on. I see you Shady Kandi!
  • Noelle asks Cynthia if she has low self esteem. Cynthia gets bent out of shape. Noelle is probably the only honest person in your life!
  • Kenya talks trash as to how Porsha’s Anger  Management can’t be cured by a “craigslist doctor!”
  • Kandi and Todd and their restaurant from hell…Is it going to have an elevator? Too many steps up and down…Maybe they will include that in the “Raising Ace” spin-off
  • Mama Joyce and crew want to get paid and the restaurant has yet to open…
  • Kandi, Cynthia, and Kenya got sugar waxed. Cynthia pretty much ate her daily calories in sugar wax.
  • Kenya shades Sheree that  Chateau Sheree is actually Chateau Thelma and that Sheree is doging the IRS…Uh oh…look what happened to Tre and Juicy Joe!
  • Porsha’s event is an Escape Room party. Lets just say she’s blonder than blond and her team (Cynthia and Kenya) didn’t help.  An event actually went smoothly without  drama. We will see how long that lasts.
  • Oh Sheree, Sheree, Sheree…this is why she’s an OG:sheree-hell-to-the-no-gif

 

Until next time,

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RHOA – House of Shade and Dust

The return of RHOA (Real Housewives of Atlanta) on Bravo wasn’t just about a big party or drama, it was all shade.

Key moments with commentary:

  • Sorry Kenya, looks like Sheree won the finished house. No one said it had to be decorated, landscaped, or even clean.                                                                                                                                        tumblr_og937my2pi1vrjwbvo1_500
  • Keyonce’s  Kray-Kraynea’s Kenya’s unfinished manor party – Either production is a shady b*tch or Kenya needs real friends to tell her that you can’t have a party when you don’t have a finished house, fashion line, toaster oven, etc…(Girlfriend, you need to have AC. Bless those guests and their runny makeup, having to walk down an incline in heels, ugh can we say Mess!)                                                                                                      tumblr_og935jp0tv1vrjwbvo1_500
  • Cynthia is divorcing smug Peter. She deserves better. I wouldn’t trust him with a two foot pole! Just saying! Oh and your daughter agrees, you might have self-esteem issues.
  • Moore Manor is more like a big cottage and Chateau Sheree has the worst views. I can’t tell which one is tackier.
  • Can I call Doggie Protective Services? Kenya, girl! You can’t leave your dogs in a doggie carrier. Get them a doggie crate or a pet hotel!
  • Can we have a RHOA: Thotlandia spinoff starring Phe Phe Phaedra and Porsha?
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  • Phaedra and Porsha’s thirst for the D! Can we get them some hot men?
  • Porsha is getting therapy to deal with anger issues, maybe she needs to go into the UFC?
  • Oh did I mention that Porsha wasn’t invited to Less Moore Manor’s crumbling unfinished “soft-opening”?
  • Can we say party crasher? Phaedra decides to have Porsha as her plus one!
  • Nene is no where in sight as expected. Girlfriend is too big of a star!
  • Eh, Kandi and Todd potty training their 6 month old. Talk about boring…Maybe start a youtube channel!
  • Shady Sheree had me cackling with her faces!

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Until next time,

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*I may sound harsh, judgy, and maybe mean girl-esque but I want a housewife to succeed! As a friend, which they need, I will not sugar coat this at all. Plus I tend to call out my fave housewives more than others…

 

 

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London Calling

Ladies of London aka Real Housewives of London premiered and let’s just say these rich ladies know how to bring in the drama.

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Key moments with commentary:

  • Caprice and Noelle are gone. I liked Caprice.
  • Juliet and Marissa, fighting about where to celebrate Thanksgiving
  • Marissa wanted to hold the event at her restaurant so she could promote it
  • Juliet betrays her bestie and asks Queen Caroline to host.
  • Queen Caroline calls out Marissa as a social climber that reeks of desperation? (Girl! That will go over well when she finds out! #drama)
  • Juliet felt judged by Caroline and had to mention that her house is worth 3 million pounds (ugh the struggle is real with that one #3millionpoor)
  • Marissa was uber offended that Caroline was throwing a rival Thanksgiving dinner (She’s not even American!) She also offends her bestie now frenemy as climbing higher inside Caroline’s a$$! (Watch out, girlfriend looks like she will drive a Louboutin in your eye!)
  • Caroline’s shady comment comparing Marissa to Martha f*cking Stewart without jail sentence. (She was read to filth!)
  • Juliet, I love you but you are a terrible friend.
  • Baroness Caroline F. Vs Queen Caroline S. = frenemies?

XO

NikkiKat

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