Ranting and Texting

I tried to not text. Took me 24 hours to text him and it was me ranting. Am I insufferable? We’ve discussed before that we needed to talk about important things either via telephone or in person. But he’s been avoiding me, so there I go on a major rant. Maybe I overwhelmed him but IDGAF. Ok, I might. Just a little bit.  I swear, I think I drunk-text when I’m not drunk.

valium

My homework was to just stop texting and attempting to call Mr. Commitmentphobe but I can’t quit and delete. A part of me wants to listen to what everyone is telling me to do and the other part of me is telling me to do what my mind and heart says. I don’t want to be the type of person that quits a non-boyfriend boyfriend relationship/friendship. If that’s what it is. My bestie thinks we are FWBs but I don’t think we are. Are we? I’ll never know because he doesn’t really speak on what he feels.

smantha

What to do? We have a history. Maybe that’s why I’m still here. Hanging around. But maybe if he makes me more angry and resentful I can move forward and delete. What would you do? Sunday, he said he would call me this week but I’m going to hold my breath. I haven’t seen in 2 weeks. What type of relationship or situation is that? If someone is “special, means a lot, you like them, you like their company, is a good person” then why don’t you want to hang out with this person?

 

XO

NikkiKat

kiss lips

 

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